Barbie Earl

Collector's Edition- The 2015 Barbie Earl

Order now and get all-new Barbie De Vere, the 17th Earl of Oxford, in time to surprise your relatives this Christmas with our Barbie tribute to the greatest author who ever lived.


Student Prince (shown) $69.99
Oxford-barbie

 

Accessorise your Barbie Earl with some elegant and yet submissive Tudor companions.

Guess what? Barbie Earl's friends are all called Ann!
Ann Boleyn has a removeable head, Ann Cecil has a realistic crying effect and Ann Vavasour can do the CanCan.

Oxford-barbie-chums

You'll never see a more lifelike Ken than Oxford-Barbie.

All your friends will be so impressed! Especially when you sit him down at his desk and reveal his secret! With Barbie Earl's quill in his hand, how could anyone ever doubt he wrote the plays?

Oxford-Barbie is ready for everything! There's no limit to what you can claim he can do.

But be Careful!! Don't let him near any servant Barbies when you're not watching! Especially if Barbie Earl is carrying his rapier!

Barbie Earl loves everything Italian. You can buy lots of fabulous extras for him. There's a pasta machine, a 16c Juventus football strip and there's even a full scale gondola complete with Singing Gondolier Ken. Once again, be careful with the other Barbies (and Kens!). Oxford Barbie loves a walk on the wild side.

Barbie Earl looks just like the real 17th Earl of Oxford. We used a real 16c artist's template to get his features just right. Every stitch and button is a masterpiece of the miniaturist's art.

No one will ever mistake your Barbie Earl for a lower-class oik from Stratford-upon-Avon.

THE BARBIE ANTHEM

I'm a Barbie Earl
In a Barbie World . . .
Some with hindsight
Call me playwright

You can see my verse
You won't read any worse
In fourteen feet - or
Iambic Pentameet - or

Oo O oo

I'm a blond bimbo Earl
in a fantasy whirl
Pick me up, teach me Greek,
I'm a writer
Dress me up, stroke my arms
Shake my spear, smell my gloves
Feel my sword, tie my belt,
make it tighter

You can touch
You can claim
You can say I wrote Shakes-peare

Set the cats
On the Strats
Can't you hear the doubters cheer?

Oo oooo ooo

Make me walk, make me talk,
do whatever you please
I wrote this, I wrote that,
I can beg on my knees
I am John over there
in my tabard of yellow
I am Hamlet, I'm Hal, I'm Othello
You can laugh, and you will,
you can say it's fantaseeeeeee
I don't care, I'm an Earl,
Mine is made just to serve meeeee

Oo oooo oooo

I'm a Barbie Earl
In a Barbie World . . .
Life in plastic
It's fantastic

OO ooooooo -

I'm having so much fun, Orazio
Well, Barbie, we're just getting started

Don't know the tune?


Four great Oxford Barbie Packs to choose from.

Grab your favourite, while stocks last! Or grab yourself a whopping 17% off by ordering all four!
Enter code VIDEBORI on your order form to claim your discount.


Down-at-heel$49.99

Rush me this one!
  • Barbie Earl
  • Tin Mining Outfit
  • Leather-effect Guilt thread,
  • Skivertex lace ruff
  • High quality nylon outfit

Poet Playwright*$79.99

No, this one!
  • Barbie Earl
  • Portrait Outfit
  • Real guilt thread, as shown
  • Quill and paper (two sheets)
  • Perfumed gloves
  • Genuine Gnomitex lace ruff
  • High quality cotton outfit
  • Barbie Earl CD
    Gabriel Harvey and Miley Cyrus sing all of Oxford's songs and the Barbie anthem. 17 minutes of bliss.
  • *Optional Muse add $39.99

Action Man$99.99

No, this one!
  • Barbie Earl
  • Armada Celebration Outfit.
    Complete with facsimile orders for the Defence of Harwich (unopened)
  • Real guilt thread, as shown
  • Rapier with blood effect
  • Perfumed gloves
  • Genuine Gnomitex lace ruff
  • High quality cotton outfit
  • Canopy with fringe action*
  • Shaking Spear*
  • Tilting lance*
  • Declaration of Uncertainty signed by Sir Derek Jacobi**
  • Barbie Earl CD
    Gabriel Harvey and Miley Cyrus sing all of Oxford's songs and the Barbie anthem. 17 minutes of bliss.
  • *batteries not included
    ** evidence not included

Share this post