Let's see if we can manage this. A proportional, fully-transferrable, weighted-ranking poll. That'll teach those pesky Oxfordians not to tinker promiscuously with us high-tech Strats, spitting in the face of democracy and The American Way. Now if only I could find out where this red wire goes…

Simply drag the options into your choice of order, silliest at the top.

Email us with any additional sophistries and foolishness that might merit consideration. Anything you send will be incorporated in the poll at the discretion of the site managers. 

Results are displayed after voting in a grouped Borda histogram, whatever that means. If you know, do write in and explain, remembering to put the words 'SPAM-FILTER-GRAB-ME' in the title field of your email. You can vote once this month and again next month when there may be more options. Psephologists agree that if Parliament was this flexible there would be no need for the Lib Dems.


  1. OXFORD'S poetry contains the germ of Shakespeare's (Looney's central thesis) (66.7%)
  2. THERE WERE two Shakespeares, one who produced plays and one who acted as a front for the Earl
  3. BIBLE markings in the Geneva Bible ascribed to Oxford were made by the author of the plays
  4. 'SWAN OF AVON' refers to Oxford's Bilton Hall near(ish) to the Avon but rented then sold 43 years before Jonson coins the phrase
  5. OXFORD was the son of Elizabeth 1
  6. UP TO 12 PLAYS, almost one third of the work, were completed by a stylistically undetectable collaborator after Oxford's death
  7. OXFORD'S contemporaries praised him as one of their leading men of letters
  8. OXFORD studied as an undergraduate at Cambridge and studied law at Gray's Inn (rather than just the wine list)
  9. OXFORD didn't die in 1604 but moved to the Isle of Mersea where he wrote the King James Bible
  10. HAMLET is autobiographical
  11. OXFORD'S name is encoded into the sonnets
  12. You can prove Shakespeare was illiterate by analysing his handwriting
  13. DE VERE'S IDENTITY is revealed in incomplete anagrams and ciphers iin books written by the likes of Henry Peacham
  14. THE EARL OF Southampton was the son of Oxford and Elizabeth 1
  15. YOU COULD sail from Verona to Milan
  16. CORIOLANUS was written in 1580
  17. STRATFORD refers to the Stratford next to Hackney (today) but several miles distant then
  18. MACBETH was completed 12 years before its first performance